An Irish Vasectomy!
After having their 11th child, an Irish couple decided that that was enough, as they couldn't afford a larger bed. So the husband went to his doctor and told him that he and his wife didn't want to have any more children..
The doctor told him there was a procedure called a vasectomy that would fix the problem but it was expensive. A less costly alternative was to go home, get a large firecracker, light it, put it in a beer bottle, then hold the bottle up to his ear & count to 10.
The husband said to the doctor, "B'Jayzus, I may not be the smartest guy in the world, but I don't see how putting a firework in a beer bottle next to my ear is going to help me with my problem."
"Trust me, it will do the job", said the doctor.
So the man went home, lit a cracker and put it in a beer bottle. He held the bottle up to his ear and began to count:
"1, 2, 3, 4, 5," then he paused,Spoiler& placed the beer bottle between his legs so he could continue counting on his other hand.................
This procedure also works in New Zealand and Tasmania