ahh, client enquiries

[xkellie]

thought some of you might get a laugh out of these. before yesterday i'd only ever seen these kinds of enquiries in photographer-related jokes. i had never actually received such an email, let alone two in two days. i've highlighted the parts i found particularly amusing, copied straight from the email (with id info taken out).

yesterday's email -

Hi there. I am seeking a wedding photographer for my wedding. no set date as yet but looking for best quotes. we will need you from Myself getting ready untill the end of reception . looking at about 9 hours. and what we wants is unlimited photos printed off or what every is the maximium, we would also like them to be all put on a disk or something similair so we can print them off our selves at home. we are looking for the best price and we want to get the post out of the photographer If you think you can help make our day that little more special feel free to quote on here or also send me a personal qoute to my email... -----@gmail.com Looking forward to hearing from you

not sure what "post out of the photographer" is... but they need to learn some basic english.

today's email -

Hi there we are having a small wedding 10/10/2010 at 10am n would like someone who is professional and caring to take a DVD and photos for our wedding. We would like excellent audio and visual on the DVD as we have watched many a wedding video with very poor quality and this was a very sad experience as we felt so sorry for the couples to have to remember such poor quality of their special day for their good money Our plan wasnt to have a photographer/videographer at all because we are on a budget and it always cost so much for this. We are hoping someone out there loves their job so much that they are not only wanting to be there for the money but are wanting to be at our wedding to showcase their passion through our special day. It will be a simple job for such a professional as we will just want pics on a disc no albulm or anything flash. So maybe a great job for a professional freelance photographer who lives in (location) and is after a lovely day out doing what they love? Thanks

i assume by "professional and caring" they mean sucker. no "professional" could take that seriously.

[I @ M]

Put your crash helmet on xkellie, I feel a roller coaster ride coming on from this post.

[Charbuque]

Anyone love cars? Mine needs a wash

[I @ M]

Anyone love cars? Mine needs a wash

Me me me!!! I will do it just for a quick drive around the block ---

Conditions are that you supply the water, hose and bucket and that it is a Ferrari ( Porsche accepted at a pinch)

[Charbuque]

Conditions are that you supply the water, hose and bucket and that it is a Ferrari ( Porsche accepted at a pinch)

Water Hose Bucket Ferrari Falcon

[I @ M]

Water Hose Bucket Ferrari Falcon

Yeah, ok, work is quiet at the moment, I'll do up a contract tomorrow --- but -- it is Winter you know so it has to have leather, Ford cloth seats simply just don't cut it mate.

Errrrr, are we anywhere near on topic for loving, caring, high quality wedding photography?

[Charbuque]

Back on track - it looks as though they may have misunderstood the meaning of the word 'free' in 'freelance'.

[ricktas]

My thoughts are that this might not be even genuine. It could be a scammer using a new technique to obtain your details. Getting two similar ones in two days tends to make be wonder.

If it is genuine, they have probably emailed it to every photographer in your area, hoping to get lucky. There is a market for what they want, and they probably will find someone willing to do the job, but maybe not from the professionals in the area, more likely from someone just starting out who wants to build their portfolio up etc.

[para]

Had a few of these with one of my businesses could your company supply blah blah blah then next email wants me to invoice more than the cost then western union the extra let me think about that err NO

[jasevk]

We want a professional so unbelievably talented who will make this mammoth task look easy.... but we don't want anything flash at the end of the day....

[Kym]

Mind you... I'll write software for good glass, but not for nothing (cept Ap)!!

[Shane.R]

post = most ?

I have a feeling the emails came from over sea's and would like to know what you charge. So they can adjust their price quote accordingly.

[xkellie]

I have a feeling the emails came from over sea's and would like to know what you charge. So they can adjust their price quote accordingly.

i thought that as well, but then i just noticed she also left a message on my website in perfect english... needless to say, i didn't give her any pricing.

[Raven]

We want a professional so unbelievably talented who will make this mammoth task look easy.... but we don't want anything flash at the end of the day....

[jeffde]

This is getting more common. Orange Camera Club was approached for a wedding photographer "to give someone the opportunity to gain some experience as we have no money" i phoned and she didn't even phone back.Luckily camera club executive said that it wasn't in the best interests of amateur photographers to step ion the toes on the wedding togs.

[Erin]

I love how these prospective clients think they are doing YOU a favour by wanting your work for free "because it's great experience". Meh!

Same with graphic design. clientsfromhell.com is a fun one to read.

[Craftypics]

My thoughts are that this might not be even genuine. It could be a scammer using a new technique to obtain your details.

Definitely seems a bit suss to me. I've had a few "dodgy" enquiries in the past and I treat them with caution

[maccaroneski]

Same with graphic design. clientsfromhell.com is a fun one to read.

The classic:

http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p2.html

Closely followed by:

http://www.27bslash6.com/missy.html

[Keith]

The classic:

http://www.27bslash6.com/p2p2.html

Closely followed by:

http://www.27bslash6.com/missy.html

Ahh man, that was good ... the first link was very very funny ... then the second one had me laughing aloud in the office with ppl looking at me! Still have tears in my eyes. Not sure if I am game to read the rest on that site now LOL.

[davidd]

Ah, man, I laughed so hard the tears were running down my legs!