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I agree about the harsher lighting. I think it would need to be more of a highlight/directional lighting. I would try the tiniest little bit of baby oil rubbed over the areas you want to highlight to pick up the lights. Pantyhose are not silks, they are quite dull and non reflective rub 5 drops onto your hands and then you get to rub it on whoever' s legs!
cheers
Jan
Interesting question finn, I have never tried to accentuate stockings as you want to do but I do know that certain types give off a more old fashioned "nylon" look than others.
Jan has hit the nail on the head with the "silks" look and to get the look right with modern day stockings I reckon you might have to experiment a bit with oil and lighting.
Generally a very directional or non diffused light will make a sheen happen in one spot and the aperture needed is going to be dependent on whether you want 2 legs in focus or 1, the angle the shot is taken and how close to the subject you are.
I might see if I can find a volunteer to experiment with and get back to you on the subject.