Mathematics. The 'pure' science. Here's a formula for you

[ricktas]

*WARNING, SOME SWEARING IN THIS JOKE*

Mathematics:
This comes from 2 math teachers with a combined total of 70 yrs. experience.
It has an indisputable mathematical logic. It also made me Laugh Out Loud.
This is a strictly mathematical viewpoint..

it goes like this:

What Makes 100%?
What does it mean to give MORE than 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%?
We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%.
How about achieving 103%?
What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help
you answer these questions:

If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z

is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

Then:
H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%

and

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E
11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%

But,

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E
1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5= 100%

And,

B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T
2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20= 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G
1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty,
that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, its the Bullshit and Ass Kissing that will put you over the top.

[Steve Axford]

I heard some sports person say recently that they always gave 200%, but now it had dropped to a mere 190% so they felt it was time to retire. The next generation of sports people will have to give 400% or even 1000%, just to show that they are better.

Perhaps Lance Armstrong gave more than 100%, but us mere mortals have to settle for a mere 100%.

[Mary Anne]

I use my Commonsense = 135 a lot so that puts me over 100%

[Mark L]

....... but now it had dropped to a mere 190% so they felt it was time to retire.

Then they joined us 190%ers at a-u-s-p-h-o-t-o-g-p-h-y.

[alsocass]

I am a math teacher... and I just want to say that adding up numbers does not give you a percent!!!

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98

not 98%

which could also be written
98*1/100
or 98/100

A percent sign is just shorthand for the fraction 1/100 afterall.

100% means 100*1/100 which is equivalent to 100/100 which basically means 1.... just saying

[ameerat42]

"math", "percent"?
Not "maths", "percentage"?
So that would make "H-A-R..." is a "take-out", not a "take-away".

Don't worry.
Am(just wonderbaring).

[mongo]

thanks Rick - that finally explains with clarity and certainty exactly what qualities are behind our 103% and 118% overachieving politicians !!

[Mark L]

I am a math teacher... and I just want to say that adding up numbers does not give you a percent!!!

H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K
8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98

not 98%

which could also be written
98*1/100
or 98/100

A percent sign is just shorthand for the fraction 1/100 afterall.

100% means 100*1/100 which is equivalent to 100/100 which basically means 1.... just saying

Thanks C-a-s-s = 42. Ah, the answer to .,..,...


- - - Updated - - -

mmmmm
M-a-r-k = 42 to.