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Thread: How to INSULT a Photographer

  1. #1
    It's all about the Light!
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    How to INSULT a Photographer

    http://www.lightstalking.com/a-pract...or-best-effect ...
    • Compliment Their Equipment
    • Ask “Did You Use Photoshop?”
    • Tell a Wedding Photographer That Your Cousin Did a Great Job of Shooting Your Sister’s Wedding
    • Mention That The Best Photo of Your Wedding Came from Uncle Bob with a Compact
    • Loudly Proclaim the Use of HDR
    • Tilt Your Head Slightly And Ask if the Horizon is Straight
    • Be Irate About Something Completely Insignificant

    Also: "My phone has more megapickels than your camera"



    Top 5 questions that you are almost guaranteed to get asked once you get a DSLR:
    1. how many mega pixels is it?
    2. how to you make the background all blurry?
    3. when will these go on facebook?
    4. why doesn't this lens zoom?
    5. can you photoshop?
    regards, Kym Gallery Honest & Direct Constructive Critique Appreciated! ©
    Digital & film, Bits of glass covering 10mm to 500mm, and other stuff



  2. #2
    Ausphotography irregular Mark L's Avatar
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    "Top 5 questions that you are almost guaranteed to get asked once you get a DSLR:
    1. how many mega pixels is it?
    2. how to you make the background all blurry?
    3. when will these go on facebook?
    4. why doesn't this lens zoom?
    5. can you photoshop?"

    Bugga, I only know the answer to the last question!
    "Enjoy what you can do rather than being frustrated at what you can't." bobt
    60D, Canon 28-105, Sigma 150-600S, Sigma 120-400, a speedlite, a tripod, a monopod, a remote release and a padded bag to carry things in.

  3. #3
    Go the Rabbitohs mudman's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mark L View Post
    "Top 5 questions that you are almost guaranteed to get asked once you get a DSLR:
    1. how many mega pixels is it?
    2. how to you make the background all blurry?
    3. when will these go on facebook?
    4. why doesn't this lens zoom?
    5. can you photoshop?"

    Bugga, I only know the answer to the last question!
    can i pass or phone a friend?

    - - - Updated - - -

    i didn't know a photographer could be insulted
    cc and enjoy

    Photography is painting with light

    K7, Pentax 18-250mm zoom, Pentax 100mm macro, Sigma 50-500mm
    Velbon Sherpa tripod Photoshop CS6

  4. #4
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    I saw this a while ago and it is hilarious!!

    I had one the other day of a friend commenting on a photo of mine on FB. This was an image that I was very proud of and took time to do editing to make it just right and she asked "Did you take this with your phone?". Hmmmm, yes, I do take images with my phone but do you really think this looks like an iPhone pic? Maybe I should retire now, if that is the case??
    Monika
    Equipment: Canon 60D, Nikon FE, Nikkor 50mm 1.8 lens, Fancier FT-662A tripod, 18-55mm kit lens, 55-250mm kit lens, 30mm 1.4 Sigma lens, LR4, PS Elements
    Check out my Flickr photos ... http://www.flickr.com/photos/missmonny/
    ... and then you can like me on www.facebook.com/PhotoByMB or see my shop on http://www.redbubble.com/people/msmonny



  5. #5
    A royal pain in the bum! arthurking83's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kym View Post
    ...
    [LIST][*]Compliment Their Equipment
    .....
    I pass my D300 over to them, and tell 'em to have a go!
    (pssst .. don't tell 'em that it's set to AF-On focus and priority release)

    The immediacy of shot and the fact that it instantly comes out all blurry surprises them to which I generally explain that using a DSLR is like driving a semi trailer or something stupid like that ...

    I show them some of my images and they generally like them, and I'll tell them that my camera is only 3.2Mp(of course they know zero about cameras!), and in 99.9% of instances they reply with:
    "Oh! .. WOW, how do you get such nice pictures with only 3.2Mp?"

    Nikon D800E, D300, D70s
    {Nikon} -> 50/1.2 : 500/8(CPU'd) : 105/2.8VR Micro : 180/2.8ais : 105mm f/1.8ais : 24mm/2ais
    {Sigma}; ->10-20/4-5.6 : 50/1.4 : 12-24/4.5-5.6II : 150-600mm|S
    {Tamron}; -> 17-50/2.8 : 28-75/2.8 : 70-200/2.8 : 300/2.8 SP MF : 24-70/2.8VC


  6. #6
    Ausphotography Regular swifty's Avatar
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    I wonder how the film guys feel about Instagram?
    Nikon FX

  7. #7
    In Training MarkChap's Avatar
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    My reply to "You have a good camera, you must get great photos"
    is
    "Picaso had great paints"
    Smoke Alarms Save Lives, Install One Today
    I shoot Canon
    Cheers, Mark


  8. #8
    Ausphotography Veteran MattNQ's Avatar
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    "Why doesn't this lens zoom"
    I have lost count of how many times my wife has picked up my camera with the 14mm/2.8 still on it & asked "How do I zoom this one". Classic was a lady sitting beside her wisely observing - "it looks big enough that it should zoom out"
    At least when it has the 80-200 on it she no longer asks "Which button zooms this in and out"
    Matt
    CC always appreciated

    My Gallery
    Even More Pics


  9. #9
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    When I'm out shooting with my super-tele and I'm asked how much zoom it has:

    "None."

  10. #10
    It's all about the Light!
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    My answers to common questions...
    • "You have a good camera, you must get great photos" -- just 'thanks' because they are ignorant

    • "How many mega pickels does that camera have?" -- 'Enough!'

    • "That camera must have cost a lot" -- 'No, I got it cheap on eBay'

    • "Did You Use Photoshop?" -- 'Only for post processing' and once 'Did you ever develop your film?'

    • "How to you make the background all blurry?" -- 'Easily!'

    • I've only had the how much does that zoom (when prime fitted) once, just gave the 'no zoom' answer and then chatted about why

    • "Can I have a copy of that shot?" -- 'No, I shoot raw and it needs to be processed'
    Last edited by Kym; 18-08-2012 at 8:31am.

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